Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I need moral support for this bender
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
