I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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