so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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