i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
You're a waste of cheezeits
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
