I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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