Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
