I wish I only lived at night.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
