I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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