OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize