I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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