Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
