Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
