i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
i came on her dog
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Panties = found
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