the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
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