i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
