Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Oh god it's open bar.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize