Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize