I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I can't trust your balls anymore.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
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