I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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