it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
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i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
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You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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