I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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