Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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