My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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