Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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