Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
