youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Randomize
