he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
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