The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize