Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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