I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Randomize