If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Randomize