The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
this just has baby written all over it
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
