just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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