he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
