i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
