Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Randomize