So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
