It's like God shit irony all over that family
Do vagina's smell?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
