Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
