Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
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