It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
