dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Randomize