im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
where am i from again
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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