Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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