i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
