I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
