It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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