I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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