Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
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