I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Houston, we have a squirter
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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